Saturday, September 13, 2014

The Story of Us

Today's prompt (for the blogtember challenge): Your current relationship status. If dating/married, give us a glimpse of your story! If single, share about this special season.

For those hoping over from Brave Love, hello!  A majority of my blog is related to teaching things, but I'm loving the blogtember challenge and my chance to share about me as a person, not just a teacher :)

I was a serious dater.  I had long term boyfriends throughout high school, college, and grad school.  After one particularly devastating break up, I decided enough. I decided I needed to stop looking for emotional fulfillment from others and be happy with myself first.  I sought professional help from a therapist, which I have no shame in admitting. We all need a little help from an unbiased, educated, outside perspective.  I talked about a lot of emotional baggage, read a lot of books, and came to a decision. I was going to be single for a year.  12 whole months in my mid twenties.  

That was a great year.  I started going with my friend M to Gilley's to line dance on a frequent basis.  I read a lot. I started going to the gym and trying zumba (trying being the key word).  I spent more time with friends (and their adorable children).  I tried new things, I went to new restaurants with friends, I went to baseball games. I used that year to strengthen my friendships and time with family.  I was happy.  The idea of dating began to creep back into my mind, but being out of grad school and working in a profession where the majority are women (elementary school), I was limited. M and I decided that come March of 2013, we'd try online dating with Match meet ups.  That was the plan.

I didn't make it the full year.  

We went out to Revolver, another country bar, to celebrate M's birthday in the beginning of February. I wasn't really feeling like going out, but my friend Adam was driving myself and Christine, so I agreed.  There was a special on whiskey, my preferred drink.  (I'm legal and was responsible enough not to be driving.)

We met up with the birthday girl and some of her high school friends, including B.  He asked what I was drinking and I replied Jack and Coke.  He made some smart aleck response about me getting his drink and I gave some snarky, sassy response right back.  I'm pretty sure there were curse words involved on my behalf.  I don't share my drinks, especially if it's whiskey.

The night proceeded in a typical fashion: line dancing, chatting with friends, and having a good time.  

I thought he was cute, but I wasn't out looking for a man. I was focused on celebrating M, our mutual friend. I said yes when he asked if I wanted to dance and in my slightly uncoordinated state, stepped on his feet more than once.  He spent most of the evening playing bar games with the boys in the group while I was line dancing with the ladies.  We hugged goodbye and that was it.

The next day, I got his number from M and texted him an apology for stepping on his feet.  We started talking and he asked me to get food. I replied no because I was watching the Super Bowl and had school the next day.  He laughed and said he didn't mean right then.  I said I wasn't looking for anything romantic but would be fine hanging out in group settings.

So we talked for a few weeks.  My friends are all super busy, so we didn't have an opportunity to set up a group hang out.  I agreed to a dinner but we had to cancel because he had to work late and well, as a teacher, I don't want to do dinner on a Wednesday at 8 pm. 

We ended up breaking all social taboos and had our first date on Valentine's Day.  He showed up thirty minutes early with flowers. I was still in the process of doing my hair, so he got a nice bonding session with my couch and one of the fur babies.  

We had our next two dates with the week and well, the rest was history. I met his family two months later for his birthday and he met mine the following month when we went to a wedding in Arizona.  He started going to college within our first month of dating, so we've been tackling that together.  

We celebrated a year and a half last month in our first home.  He knows where my grandma's ring is and that I'd like the center stone reset as my engagement ring. He knows I'd like him to ask my mom's permission first.

We've talked about parenting and baby names.  We've talked about the must-haves at our wedding and what we definitely don't want.  Our friend M, who we met through? She'll be officiating the ceremony.  Jack & Cokes will be available at the reception (I'm finally able to share my whiskey with him. Must be love!)  We've talked about our future and the only thing I want to change is to have matching last names and joined bank accounts.

He's like no other man I've ever dated. He's the youngest, which is a nice contrast to me being the oldest.  He's very laid back and a true type B personality, which mellows my type A one.  I motivate him, he calms me down.  He's helpful, supportive, and calls me on my sass.

That's the story of us. It's still unfolding but I'm excited for this journey.


  1. Sounds like a good beginning to this love story of yours! It's very smart to talk about all of those expectations and plans for the future ahead of time!

  2. Thank you for sharing your story- I loved reading!! Taking a year of singleness is so important to really have time to focus on yourself and spend time w/ family & friends. I really like that idea!! Cheers to your relationship!!