Sunday, February 19, 2017

Marriage, 3 months in

We just celebrated 3 months of being married and four years since our first date.

Already, I'm a little sick of these questions:

1) What's changed?!

2) When are you starting a family?!

3) Are you sad the wedding is over?!i

First, nothing has really changed.  We already lived together. We already started a life together.  

I changed my name with the social security office, my bank, and DMV.  I'll be changing it with the school district this summer.  I have a legitimate worry that changing my name will come with the unintended consequence of losing my grade book and all my documents on the shared folder.  So instead, I'll deal with this over the summer.  I'll change my name on car registration in August when I get my annual smog check & pay my fees.

We have new silverware, I guess that's changed.  We are enjoying our wedding presents. 

But honestly, nothing has really changed.

I sort of feel like if things drastically change after the wedding, you're doing something wrong.  I know who I married, our wedding didn't change our relationship.  

Second, the whole starting a family thing...this one really frustrates me.  I have friends that have struggled with infertility.  I have friends who have miscarried.  I have friends that don't want kids.  This is a super personal question and not one I feel comfortable discussing with coworkers.  I've been married three months.  Even if I was pregnant (which I'm not), I wouldn't be sharing it yet anyway.  We'd like to pay off our wedding (and new bed set) first.  We'd like to wait until he's done with school (May). I'd like to enjoy drinking on our honeymoon this summer.  Would we like a family? Yes. Would we like one right this second? No. The puppy is enough for now.

Third, no, I'm not.  The wedding was lovely. I spent a lot of time and energy preparing for it. I have amazing friends and family who were tolerant of the process.  But I'm glad it's over. We can focus on us, and not seating charts. He can focus on homework and I can focus on helping others get ready for their special days.

No comments:

Post a Comment